I'm Sorry ... Living While Female

feministing had a post pointing to a blog called "a cat and twenty".

"Last month, joss whedon posted a lengthy lament about the way women are perceived and treated, uniformly around the globe, as inferior and detestable beings. his thoughts were in reaction to the infamous internet video of a kurdish girl, Dua Khalil, whose death by stoning was captured for posterity* by cameraphones in the mob that murdered her. [from another blog: "...hear the jeering of the mob of men who circled her like hyenas and tortured her to death."] this reminded him, somewhat randomly but understandably, of the trailer for an upcoming movie in which the sum of the action is the kidnapping, torture, and murder of a beautiful young woman. whedon writes,

"The trailer resembles nothing so much as the CNN story on Dua Khalil. Pretty much all you learn is that Elisha Cuthbert is beautiful, then kidnapped, inventively, repeatedly and horrifically tortured, and that the first thing she screams is “I’m sorry”.""...... about the De Anza gang rape case, for me, was this observation from one of the female party-goers who helped the girl to safety:

This poor girl was not moving...She had her one shoe one, her jeans were wrapped around one of her ankles and her underwear was left around her ankles. To the left of the bed there was some condom thrown on the ground. When they lifted her head up, her eyes moved and she said 'I'm sorry.'
She was sorry. she knew enough, even drunk to the point of unconsciousness and physically incapable of movement, that she was sorry about something. because we always are. we are always supposed to be."

I had a hard time finishing

my coffee after reading the blogs and looking at the video. How many times have I been bumped by some guy, then I aplogetically said "I'm sorry" to his retreating back. .... But there are thoughts that the "I'm sorry" comes from a well of compassion and empathy, for which women are well known. I have said "I'm sorry" to nurses who had to clean up after me ... not that I was apologising, but that I felt for the work that I found arduous or distasteful. If I were raped and beaten what would I say? "I'm sorry?" Maybe. Depends on whom I was talking to. I have this feeling that women are using a handicapped tote board. We simply don't have the words to express our selves. We must make do with the words that men have chosen.